Grooming in preparation for molestation - In cases of grooming, much of what we teach our children about sexual abuse creates does more to exacerbate the child's guilt and shame when they realize something is wrong than to encourage them to tell. At what point should she have shouted “NO!”? Whom should she have told? It's frightening for parents—even good parents. No wonder so many simply choose to pretend it simply doesn't happen or couldn't happen to their child.